Happy Fathers day to all fathers out there, in spirit, dog dads and those who one day hope to be dads. For so many today can bring about so many different emotions, grief, anger, heart break and just a massive sense of loss.
This year the boys weren't to bothered by today, I think I was probably more upset than they were. We did the usual and went to the beach where they chucked rocks in the sea and tried (and failed) to not get wet and collected some pebbles to bring home where they wrote messages for their dad and honour the grandads that we have lost.
I always struggle with dates like this and have done for a long time. My Grandad was my Hero and still is and I have always struggled with his loss so on days like fathers day I feel his loss even more which is why I worry the boys are more affected that what they probably are ha! I am so proud of how the boys handle these times we always try and make them a special occasion filled with love and joy and they are always so accepting.
Being a single parent and having to play both roles can be overwhelming and lonely. I miss having someone to bounce ideas off and make memories with as a family. It a lot of pressure constantly with no breaks (unless they are at school or nanny comes over) and you find you are second guessing every little thing and wondering if you are doing a 'good enough job' which I know we can only ever do the best we can but the guilt is still there. So to all you other single parents, it is normal to have this guilt and to feel sad but always know you are doing an amazing job!
I hope you have all in some way had a fantastic day and if you haven't I hope tomorrow brings you joy and happiness.
Untill next time..
As Always,
All my Love
Sammiie
